Fanfiction - Maybe, Someday, Smile

-Shuichi-

I don�t understand, sometimes, why I stay. I mean, its not like I mean anything to Yuki. If I did he wouldn�t tell me to get lost. He wouldn�t call me a moron or annoying. He�d tell me that he loves me, tell me how much he wants me around. Hell, he�d even let me sleep somewhere other than the couch.

"Shuichi-kun?" I heard a voice cut through my thoughts. I turned to face Fujisaki, who had spoken, and Hiro.

"Hai?" I asked, as though I had been paying attention the whole time. I could see Fujisaki�s slight annoyance and Hiro�s worry.

"Seguchi-san and K have a song they want us to do, from a band called Madison Avenue." Fujisaki spoke slowly as though he were making sure I was listening to him, "During the performance tomorrow."

"Oh, ok." I smiled briefly, "Let me see the lyrics."

-Yuki-

Annoyance. I hate people who distract me. Shuichi. I don�t understand him. I hate things I can�t understand also. I grew up with the impression that when someone tells you to go away, you do. It hurts your self-esteem not too. That�s one of the things about Shuichi that I don�t quite see.

I remembered the last we fought, "You know, Yuki, with all the romance novels you write you�d think you�d know a little bit about it." I remembered laughing at that comment. He looked so cute, his violet eyes betraying all the words he said. I couldn�t help but to reach over and brush a stray pink strand from his eyes, he looked so beautiful.

-Shuichi-

He was working again. Not that that came as any surprise. All I wanted was to tell him about him about the song. And about how Hiro was nagging me about eating again today. I hadn�t meant to upset him. And then�. He told me to get out. To go do something for a few hours and let him work in peace.

I told him that he�d been working all day but if that�s what he wanted, maybe I would go and maybe I wouldn�t come back.

Dammit. Why did I do something so stupid? He told me that his life would be better that way, anyway. That it�d be quieter and he could meet his deadlines sooner rather than later.

I didn�t cry when I walked out the door, or down the street. I didn�t cry when Hiro opened the door, or when I told him the story. I didn�t cry until I went to bed that night and couldn�t hear the sound of the computer typing or the sound of someone breathing down the hall. The room doesn�t smell like cigarette smoke and after-shave. The living room wasn�t impeccably clean, like the rest of the apartment.

It wasn�t Yuki�s apartment.

-Yuki-

I can�t believe he left me. He left me. I never thought that Shuichi Shindou would ever get up the courage to walk out on me. It isn�t the noise, I realized, that got to me. It was the silence. The silence when he wasn�t around and the silence that I surrounded myself with even if he was there.

I stood abruptly, knocking the mug of cold coffee and the astray to the floor, I went and looked briefly at my bedroom and I knew then I wouldn�t be able to sleep that night. Instead I walked over to the TV and flickered. MTV came on with a countdown, "3 hours until Bad Luck will appear!" the announcer shouted, crazed fan girls screaming, "Shuichi!!"

I put the remote down and watched as one of their music video�s came on.

-Shuichi- (3 hours later)

I can�t believe I agreed to appear on MTV at 7:30. I don�t think I can handle this. They flew out here to tape us performing �Who The Hell Are You� for a bunch of wide-eyed ditzes. I don�t know about this.

It amazes me how much this song fits with my current relationship. Yuki. It was as though I were a robot as I walked onto the stage. I wondered briefly if maybe he�d be watching. No, I decided mechanically, he�s sleeping, or writing. Some stupid concert wouldn�t catch his attention.

The music flew in a techno beat, pounding through me. The words became me. They became my thoughts, dreams, realities. When it came time to sing I wasn�t sure if I was singing to the fan girls or relaying a message to Yuki. "Now when I, was a little boy, My mama sat me down and told me all about the world, Now she, she told me true, she said one day you would probably break my heart in two. But now I, I beg to differ baby, I don't take it the way you like to give it, Now look at you, on your knees, sweet as sugar baby, sayin' please... I said I'm looking at you, well Said I'm looking at you, aah hah I said I'm looking at you, yeah." I wondered again if he were watching, and if he was, what he was thinking�

-Yuki-

In the beginning I watched with mild interest. I hated the song the first time I�d heard it and this version wasn�t all that better. But when the camera focused on Shuichi�s eyes I realized there was more behind this than the lyrics.

"Now who the hell are you, to treat me like that? I don't care where you've been, what you've done, or where you're at. Now who the hell are you, to act the way you do? You won't be smiling by the time I'm through with you. Now who the hell are you?"

The camera panned the crowd, all holding signs like, "Shuichi! Marry Me!" "I Love You HIRO!" "Yay! Omi Number Two!" (that was for Shy) "Shuichi, I Luv You!" all the fan girls watched, their eyes glued to Shuichi, Hiro and Fujisaki. Some of them were quite beautiful, I wonder why Shuichi doesn�t have a girlfriend. Well, I know why, I just meant why he doesn�t just choose one of them.

Because you, Baka, he wants you!

"Well now, ain't no cheating, ain't no lying. Ain't no explaining, justifying going on around here. Now stand up and be a man. If you want it, come and get it baby, catch me if you can."

-Shuichi-

"Come on and catch me if you can. Well you know that, if you want it, come and get it, if you want it..." I let the microphone go with a sigh of disappointment. I was just getting into the song. I let the techno waves pulse through me as the song finished and the crowd cheered. We stood and walked back stage after bowing.

I went into my dressing room and noticed it smelt like cigarette smoke. I turned to face Yuki. "YYYYYYUUUUUUKKKKKKIIIIII!!!!!!!" I screamed as I flung myself into his arms. He caught me. He didn�t let me fall or move out of the way. He caught me. I looked up at him and he whispered, "You look a little cute right now."

I felt his lips on mine and I couldn�t help but welcome them. After a moment he pulled away gently and half-smiled, "You should smile more." I told him.

"Maybe, someday." He said, "You could make me smile."

"I love you, Yuki." I whispered into his silk shirt.

"I know." He replied into my hair, "And I think I might love you too, Shuichi."

After Yuki left and I grabbed Hiro and Fujisaki and stormed the stage. We played until early that morning, the girls never stopped screaming and I couldn�t stop singing.

Maybe, someday, you could make me smile.

~Owari

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